All day today i've been feeling really weird. And then i finally realized what it was. I feel many things at the moment. I feel unattractive and rejected for the most part. I can't let myself cry about this anymore. But i can't fight back the tears. I don't know if this is how it will always be or maybe because it was my first love. And im just upset that i don't even know who he is anymore. No matter what im doing im always thinking about him, what hes doing, who hes with. i don't know what i can do about it. its been 2 months i would have thought things would be easier by now. i was wrong. and i hate how everything reminds me of him. i need to stop this.